Thoughts on “The Daily Stoic” by Ryan Holiday & Stephen Hanselman

The philosophy of Stoicism has never been so popular; perhaps its appeal has had greater pull during these strange times, as all of us grapple with the baffling uncertainty of existence. Or maybe, it carries resonance at any time of our lives, simply because the wisdom of the Stoics, written thousands of years ago, still rings so true in modern society. Safe to say that for anyone interested in developing their character and wanting to gain greater understanding into human nature, then the Stoics will never go out of fashion!
Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman have produced a wonderful book in this collection of meditations from three of stoicism’s greatest practitioners: Marcus Aurelius, Seneca & Epictetus. Although this book was first published in 2016, I can’t help but feel that its import holds even more significance as we continue to navigate our way through the choppy waters of COVID 19.
This book is perfect for dipping into on a daily basis or, if you are hungry like I am (!), you can gorge on three or four meditations each day. What I love about the book’s structure is the analysis the authors provide on each meditation. They illustrate perfectly how these three wise philosophers, writing as they were in times of plague, warfare and uncertainty, were all attuned to what we need to do, deep down, if we want to lead a meaningful and purposeful life. For this is central question that the Stoics explore: how to live a life, infused with meaning and integrity, and remain untroubled by external circumstances in the process.
Divided into three sections, following the main tenets of Stoical philosophy – discipline of perception, discipline of action and discipline of will, we are taken on a journey into the realms of our ego, thinking and identity and encouraged to interrogate whatever beliefs we may hold and act upon new found knowledge. For this is key: whether we can put into action what these learned philosophers write about.
Ultimately, this book is all about growth and learning about one’s self in relationship to the world, and how better we can manage our emotions in a world plagued by instability and fragility. Wisdom breathes and sings on every page, pertaining to all aspects of our lives. While it is vital to realise the imperishable truth that we never stop learning, it is just as important to remember that we are blessed with a plethora of gifts, and that we should do our best to water and nurture them as we journey through life. In the words of Marcus Aurelius:
“Hold sacred your capacity for understanding. For in it is all, that our ruling principle won’t allow anything to enter that is either inconsistent with nature or with the constitution of a logical creature.”

“Beauty is truth – truth beauty” – The Way of Integrity by Martha Beck

Countless books are published every year in the field of self-help. promising to improve your life, like some kind of quick-fix twelve step program, that will change who you are, instantly, guaranteed results! Obviously, there are many beautiful books written that have and will continue to have a huge impact on millions of people’s lives. Yet sometimes it can feel a bit difficult to separate the wheat from the chaff, such is the onslaught that is the personal development industry. Notwithstanding the fact that it is big business, I believe wholeheartedly that reading a few titles a year in this genre, if they resonate and come with bona fide recommendations, can have a massive effect on how we think, feel and act, as we strive to give meaning to our lives and understand this crazy, beautiful world that surrounds us.Having first listened to Martha Beck talking to Jay Shetty on his podcast, “On Purpose” about her new book, “The Way of Integrity“, a few months back, I made a mental note at the time that this felt like a book I needed to read. Well, some months later, in the rich fullness of a glorious Autumn, I am heartened to say that this more than lived up to expectation. Martha Beck has written a book that is necessary, profound, important, vital and chimes with humanity’s anxieties in modern times.

The central tenet of Martha’s book is that we can only fully embrace love when we are at one with ourselves (our nature) and living a life of integrity, “the path to true love – true anything – is the way of integrity.” Drawing upon her own life story, with its many challenges, and observations of those lives whom she has helped along the way, Martha paints a compelling picture that if we do the work and acknowledge how integrity is the bedrock for all that we do and are in life, then the world will indeed open to us and we will lead happier and more fulfilled lives. 

Taking Dante’s “The Divine Comedy” as a framework, Martha takes us on a journey on how we can move from a state of error through the realms of Inferno and Purgatory, before ending up in Paradise. Ultimately, the journey doesn’t end, but what I found especially striking was the manner in which she doesn’t patronise her reader; instead, she writes with great compassion and clarity, providing a series of exercises throughout as we strive to get a better understanding of our relationship with perhaps the most important person in our life: our self.

A sign of a good book for me is when I feel the urge to annotate furiously in the margins or simply want to scream an unabashed “Yes” as I reach the end of a sentence. This happened throughout “The Way of Integrity“. Here are a few quotes, which struck a chord with me:

On shattering false assumptions:

“It means replacing rigid convictions with curious openness, to your own sense of truth in every moment.” (Chapter 6)

On lies and deception:

“Any lie, even an unconscious one, splits us from integrity.”

(Chapter 8)

On freedom:

“The ultimate freedom lies in our capacity to interpret the world in new ways.”

There are many more which I could add. This book truly is a treasure trove of wisdom. Martha doesn’t provide easy answers to life’s obstacles; rather, she encourages us to see that we are capable of so much joy and contentment if we take a pickaxe to our false beliefs and realise this vital truth – that when we are in alignment with our core values, how much richer and more radiant life becomes.Who is this book aimed at? Essentially, it is for anyone who is curious about wanting to live a life that is truer, freer and more aligned with their inner beliefs. And anyone who is simply fascinated by personal development, spiritual growth, and psychology. Covid-19 has affected all of us in myriad ways, but maybe the most conspicuous way it has challenged us is our relationship with ourselves, as we have come face to face with mortality and the intrinsic brevity of life. In the end, this is the most important relationship we will cultivate, during the brief time we have on Earth, alongside all those other soul-nourishing relationships we nurture. It is only when we think, feel, live and act with honesty and pure intention, that we can fully reveal who we are and embrace life with a sense of wholeheartedness and courageous compassion. Thank you Martha Beck for writing such a beautiful and enlightening book, reminding this particular reader that love, integrity and harmony are inextricably connected:

“You are lovable. You are loved. You are love.”

Embrace The Monastic Spirit

Serendipity is one of my favourite words in the English language and captures perfectly a happy discovery I chanced upon in 2020, the “On Purpose” podcast hosted by the quite brilliant Jay Shetty. Each week, Jay delves deep into the wonders of the human mind and spirit, whether that be through engaging guests in probing conversation or exploring a particular topic that may be on his mind. Such is the manner and humility in which Jay steers the conversation, in asking sensitive, interesting and open-ending questions, I always feel like I learn something new. It is the same with his new book, “Think Like A Monk.”

If ever there was a book that needed to be written in the age that we are currently living in, then this is it. The pandemic has affected us all in countless ways but perhaps the most lasting impact will be on our minds, that’s if we allow it. In this beautifully written and anecdote-filled tome, Jay challenges us to embrace the monastic spirit. This doesn’t mean that we all need to check into a monastery for months on end (though a week’s retreat would be the perfect cure for many of us!), rather we can tap into some of the values and skills that Jay has learned on his journey from career destined in the city to finding his true purpose living as a monk in India to moving to Los Angeles to help spread all the wisdom that he has learned and experiences he has navigated.

The book is divided into three sections: Let Go, Grow, Give. which help illustrate the arc that Jay has undergone. Each section is further divided into chapters, each one exploring a particular aspect that drives us or affects all of us, such as: fear, purpose, relationships, gratitude, service. What makes his writing feel so fresh and powerful is that Jay is unafraid to turn the focus on himself, highlighting his own flaws and anxieties as he grapples with the decisions he makes on his journey to enlightenment. The key emphasis being that it is a journey, there is no fixed end point.

Once we are conscious of who we are and what we can offer, then meaning will arrive in our lives. As he writes, “the key to real freedom is self-awareness.” We are more than our thoughts. Ultimately, through strengthening our minds, we strengthen our whole sense of self – it is about recognising that we all need to give ourselves the “space, stillness and solitude” to be able to nourish our minds and bodies. As Jay alludes at various points, it is possible to do this, even in noisy situations, and still be fully present.

It should be said that this isn’t a self-help book, although the author does provide plenty of tips throughout to help “think like a monk”. Instead, it should be viewed as a guide in how it is possible to become more engaged and energised, alert and attentive, “you create your own reality in every moment”; how we can better flourish as humans in our interactions with others as we travel through life and reach a richer understanding of the one person with whom we will all have a lifelong relationship: our self.

“Felicity” by Mary Oliver

Is there a book that you like to give away over and over? Is there a book that you turn to at regular intervals in your life? Is there a book that acts as a counsellor, a friend, a comfort, a consoler, a realist, an idealist, a bridge to empathy, a window of light? if there is, then this why books possess an indefinable magic and why, like all great loves, their spirit never truly dies.

“Felicity” by the American poet Mary Oliver is one such book for me. Mary Oliver, who died early 2019, was one of the great American poets of the latter part of the 20th Century and early 21st. Steeped in the transcendentalist vision of Emerson and Thoreau, the exuberance of Whitman, and the eager eye of Emily Dickinson, Mary Oliver wrote with brilliant perception about the physical world she immersed herself in, letting the natural world take centre stage and reminding her audience that there are other worlds and other dimensions to taste and relish besides the human one. Her philosophy is one of deep sensitivity, lucid empathy, and a life-affirming sense of expansion, that nothing is too small to be wondered about.

These qualities shine forth in “Felicity”, which examines that most fascinating of topics that interests us all: love. Some of the poems are only a few lines long, yet this is to suggest a disservice as to their merit. Within these parameters, Oliver conveys more sense and beauty that many lesser poets would strive to achieve in poems of greater length and opaqueness. “Felicity” can be read in a quick thirty minute burst from cover to cover but in order to savour the full magic of the writing, it is best to read slowly and fully appreciate each poem for the enriching morsels they are.

Oliver invites us along the journey with the great Persian poet, Rumi, acting as a guiding spirit, injecting the poems with pearls of wisdom, a credo for living and loving, threaded with compassionate humour. There are poems that you will want to declaim in recognition and commit to memory, for the sheer sense of exuberance and aliveness they contain. For example, in “Moments”, the central lines underscores one of the main themes of the collection:

Your heart is beating, isn’t it?
You’re not in chains, are you?

These nuggets of learning sit cheek by jowl with poems that more obviously speak of love. In “I Know Someone” , the poet compares kissing with a flower opening and, despite acknowledging a flower’s potent charm to captivate, concludes that ultimately it is humans who are the fortunate ones as we can kiss other humans and realise the supreme and tangible delight of connection.

There is a recurring sense in this collection of 38 poems, that love is the highest ideal that we can aspire to, “love is the one thing the heart craves”. Notwithstanding the pain and affliction that life will throw at us, from time to time, it is a force worth seeking out, worth embracing, and worth singing about. Mary Oliver may have departed from earth, but her poems transcend the mundane and will continue to blaze bright, long into the future. Seize the rich lens of attention, she advocates, and never lose your childlike sense of awe, your acceptance of mortality and, above all, your desire to love. Live while you can, have fun along the way, and wear the cloak of gratitude with unbounded joy.
To put it blithely, these poems capture perfectly why harbouring an open heart and an alert mind are fundamental qualities in a poet, besides a keen sense of the precision of language and an eye for the fitting image, “I don’t want to lose a single thread/ from the intricate brocade of this happiness”. Dive in, at any point, into this book and you will come swimming to the surface in a state of buoyancy – revitalised, refreshed, and reborn.

“Talking To My Body” by Anna Swir: An Unflinching Examination of Body and Soul

Czeslaw Milosz, the great Polish poet, writes of Anna Swir, in the introduction to this collection, that she is “a poet of personal life, of love and love’s pains.” This, to me, seems a pithy yet perfect summation of Swir’s form and content. Her writing is such, that once you dip into her poetical waters, it is impossible not to want to embrace fully the limpidity of her poetry. Some may quibble that the plainness and seeming unsophistication of the style may militate against placing a high value on the currency of Swir’s poems. This reader would beg to differ. What may at first appear to be a simplicity, conceals profound truths about some of the fundamental themes in life that affect us all.

The diversity of the subject matter helps to make this collection resonate; whether that be poems about her parents, poems exploring the role of femininity, poems that deal frankly with matters of flesh, sex, ageing, mortality, motherhood, childhood and poems that investigate that greatest of emotions: love. This is poetry rooted in an earthiness, delineating the rich textures of daily-life. Abstraction is considered but these are poems that have a concrete foundation and, in their connectedness, celebrate the indomitability of the human spirit.

It has often been said that poetry is a “broad church”, which naturally means there are many definitions of what poetry is. I have always been fond of the brilliant British poet, Carol Ann Duffy and her belief that “poetry, above all, deals with emotion.” The emotional honesty in “Talking to My Body” rings apparent. It is as if Swir has taken a scalpel to her body and exposed the nest of feelings and tangled thoughts beneath. One gets the impression that these poems are written with an intent to impose some order,beauty and meaning on events. The intensity is manifest. Reflecting on the birth of her child in “Maternity”, Swir writes:

“And suddenly I am flooded

by a high, luminous wave

of humility

Powerless, I drown”

The translators have done a magical job in capturing the intensity and depth of feeling that Swir strove for her in her poetry (it seems fitting that Milosz, one of the greatest poets of the 20th century, should have a hand in promoting and praising his compatriot’s poetry). There are phrases that leap off the page, which the keen reader will want to cherish and savour: “How good to own/ a portable sun”; “I want to be clean as Nothingness”; I made love with my dear/ as if I made love dying/ as if I made love praying.” One can discern that Swir is triangulating three branches, which might best be described as: thinking, feeling, knowing. For there is no doubt that these are poems for the mind as much as they are for the body and soul.

Perhaps of equal significance to this compelling collection is the discussion at the end between Czeslaw Milosz and his collaborator in translation, Leonard Nathan; the discussion is as much a philosophical investigation of Swir’s form and style as it is interpretive and makes for essential reading. Of course, the poet should have the final word and Swir’s assertion on what she considers the poet to be will, one hopes, strike a chord and may be a springboard for those yet to discover the limpid,earthy and sapient quality of a supreme stylist: “the poet should be as sensitive as an aching tooth.”

Poetry for the Soul: Verses of Freedom

A Review of Wild by Ben Okri

This is a collection to stir the mind, fire the heart and energise the jaded soul. Ben Okri writes from the heart, exploring subjects most people can relate to – love, identity, war, conflict, terror, humanity, the universe – that it is impossible not to fall under the spell of his writing. In many ways this book of 47 beautifully resonant poems is a paean to the natural world as indicated by the title, “Wild” – but it is also a song of praise to the natural aspect of mankind – the pure beauty that lies within – which sometimes gets lost in the strife of life and maelstrom of living. There is music to be heard, if we but listen, “a richer music revealing the whole” (The Soul of the Nation) and if we but open our minds and hearts, “the world is rich/with great love unfound” (The World is Rich).

Okri is a writer who not only revels in the musicality of language but in the symbolism that the word can evoke. In many ways, poetry is the most appropriate medium in which the plea for tolerance, beauty and acceptance of the earth’s incredible riches can best be expressed. Like his other poetry collections “An African Elegy” and “Mental Fight”, Okri’s unfettered spirit shines through. Whether describing the vibrancy of Africa or the diversity that surrounds us, these are poems that have been forged with intense wonder, yet acutely aware of the elements that underpin our very existence.

Dylan Thomas once quipped that “poetry is what makes my toenails twinkle”. Well, if that’s the case, then this is poetry that will make your hair flare. Reading these poems encourages the reader to embrace the boundless capacity of the human imagination and the indomitability of the human spirit. Life, at times, can be bewildering, chaotic and incomprehensible but resilience and the possibility of hope is always present, if we see, feel and listen with our heart and senses. This from “Dreams”:

                                                        “Today is a new chaos

                                                         A new journey. A new city:

                                                         Needing new paths. And new standards”

 A constant echo that struck me as I read this collection was John Donne’s message that “No Man is an Island”. Nowhere is this made more explicit than in the titular poem, “Wild”, “everything should connect with everything”. It is often stated that poetry can act as a lifeboat for the weary soul; give this book to anyone you know who might have fallen out of love with life, living and giving and their joy may be rekindled. Hope springs eternal, as long as there is life. In the midst of despair – in the dark night of being – there is always some magic to be found, “a melody of light that transforms the night.”

The overriding philosophy that shapes this book is best encapsulated in “I sing a New Freedom”:

                                                   “Only those who remain free in spirit

                                                     Will find their way out of the maze.

                                                     But we are children of the stars,

                                                     And we ought to amaze.”

 Okri’s ability to impress upon readers is most clearly demonstrated in the powerful and luminous phraseology he deploys. Freedom of self is a constant theme (if one was going to choose a song to accompany the verse, “Redemption Song” by Bob Marley would be the most appropriate), “In our minds we swim or sink” (from “As Clouds Do Drift”).

“Wild” is bookended by poems to his mother and father, which seems entirely in keeping with the message of the poetry – that the cycle of humanity and life lives on, “my turn has come round at last”, the wisdom that is handed on from generation to generation, and which is refashioned in turn, helps give sustenance to this beautiful gift that we have been given:

                                                “Plant the secrets of the way

                                                  That I may live

                                                  More wisely every day.”

 Read this collection, let the words wash over you, absorb the optimistic refrain that permeates the poetry and you – the reader – will feel refreshed, eager to embrace a world, that whilst occasionally baffling, is, most of the time, still beautiful.